basically, I am tired. again. erin is feeling multiple things at the same time, and they are as follows... impressed by a man who loves Jesus and a dear friend very very much, disappointed in the choices of another, confused/annoyed by the actions of another, anxious for the presence of another (whoever that is...), content with the presence of One alone

here is the conclusion I have come to, basically, on the way home. I know what I want. I know what I've waited my whole life for, I believe God is preparing someone amazing and is preparing me for that Mr. Amazing, and I'm not compromising. I'm not making excuses anymore, and I'm not trying to rationalize. It is what it is, and if it isn't, then it isn't. <-- that right there was profound, fyi. I don't want to talk myself into or out of anything. I only want what God wants, and I'm gonna just leave it in His hands- He has been faithful, He has led me through so much, how could I possibly doubt His sovereignty over every part of my life, especially this?

And do you know what? Right now, I can't think of anything better than to just sit at my Savior's feet quietly listening, learning, worshipping... especially at this time of year, I just want to be still, to take in the miracle as deeply as my human heart can, to be in wonder of it all, that my God would send His Son into this world, to walk the same streets, breathe the same air, see His Father's creation as I see it now, maybe even share in joyful laughter over the same little things I do... that's simply more than I can imagine

The simplest of all love songs
I want to bring to You
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You